Everything is wearing on me today.
I tell myself to relax. To calm down. That things aren't so bad. Never so bad that I can't handle it. And I go for a walk and breathe deeply and feel almost okay.
And then I open the door.
Good Lord! What happened in here?!
And then I remember. I have a goddamn five-year-old!
Precious, angelic, love of my life five-year-old, yes. But goddamn all the same.
Hours I spent yesterday cleaning this house. Hours I spent scrubbing, dusting, vacuuming, organizing. And today?
Oy.
Was yesterday a dream? I can't think of any other explanation. How else could one small child create the utter devastation I see before me?
So, I do what any sane person would do. I retreat to the mind-numbing haven of the interweb. I find sweet salvation in the inane.
I find this...
And I feel better.
Oh, internet, you've done it again!
16 comments:
That's a lot of 5 year olds! Jeez. I'd be trampled and beaten. I don't think I'd even try to fight back - just assume fetal position and pray.
You're not alone in the wondering if it was a dream. With two year old twin girls, nothing stays tidy for long. I look back at pictures of my house pre-twins and I'm amazed at how gorgeous everything looks. Fresh flowers, spotless carpets and shining glass. *Sigh*
But one day, far down the road, I bet we'll look at our empty, spotless houses and yearn for our kiddos and the chaos.
i have one 8.5 year old and one 2.5 year old. why must the 8.5 year old leave her clothes wherever she disrobes? how MANY hampers do i have to buy and leave all over the house? flip, we've even got one in the kitchen now.! we're just hours away from having a laundry drop-spot in the potty!
and there are emergency toy tubs dotted all around our house. STILL THE TOYS ARE EVERYWHERE. when i find the person buying them all this crap.... oh, wait. crap.
perhaps i'm approaching this the wrong way. i do that a lot.
Oh my Gaaaaaaaaaaawd Avery. I have the almost 3 year old and almost 7.5 year old mess monsters. I just don't tidy now, and the house looks no different as they mess it up so quick you can't blink if you want to see clean.
Bugger.
I also feel yr pain
it is like groundhog day each day with clean/mess
I sometimes give up and join in
I throw food directly at the washed floor
just to hear myself laugh like the crazy woman I am :)
I haven't ever felt the pain of the role of domestic goddess, till I moved in with a man. He does work all day, yes, while I go to class, come home, do the dishes, do the laundry, do any random chores that were left undone the day before. It sucks picking up after myself, let alone someone else.
Huckdoll--two-year-old twins?! Good Lord, woman. How do you even manage to get out of bed in the morning?! My hat's off to you!
Holly--you're enabling. Stop buying hampers! She's almost 9, for goodness sake, and last I heard, the Queen's legs were not broken. (This is called tough mommy love. ;o) )
Jo--I generally embrace that mantra myself. But sometimes I like to remind myself what it's like to have a nice, clean house. More fool I.
Amy--I can just imagine your maniacal cackle! Bet you have a good one. Mine needs work.
Lilac--yeah, I thought it was bad when it was just the two of us, too. If only I'd known... If only I'd known...
Three year old and a ten month old. I'm hiding from my living room as we speak (write...whatever) :D
Imagine having all of that crap in a tiny one bedroom apartment. It's taken a lot of patience, but my son is learning that if he wants to play with something, he darn well better pick it up when he's done. I am not below threats (do you ever want to see that toy again?). A clean house is not the most important thing in the world, but it's important to my sanity. Mostly because of the space issue. I wasn't so umm, freakish about it in our large three bedroom apartment.
I totally feel your pain, sistah.
But I think you could take on sixteen, maybe even SEVENTEEN five year olds, hands down ;)
Claire--I can't hide from the mess. It follows me!
Natalie--when space is at a premium like that, I totally understand how important it is to keep it clean. I learned that in my first apartment. Can't imagine living there with a child. My heart goes out to you!
Rima--I don't know. They're pretty wiry. And if they swarm you, they're like a bunch of piranha. Lots of little teeth.
You mean, the whole cleaning with a kid jag doesn't get easier?
No! Don't tell me that!
I reckon I could take a few 5 year olds in a fight - as long as they hadn't been eating bananas beforehand. But I'm not sure I could defeat THIRTEEN! Go Avery.
Mess? Do what I do. Kick it under the sofas.
Mya x
Heh - just wait until he's 14, 16.... 18. My house was cleaner when they were little. Of course, I actually spent more time there back then. Could be that's my problem. Could be I stopped caring a while ago.
That's a lot of kids!
I'm not ready for a 5 year old. My babies are growing too quickly. :(
and thats why I am grateful to have an 11 year old......Those days are long since over for me. whew!
were moving into the *eye roll* phase.... Fun Fun Fun....NOT!!
Dang, you're one strong woman. Remind me not to piss you off. :)
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