In my long blogging career, I've come across a number of posts, like this one, which have been directed at the authors' former selves--wisdom they'd impart to their younger counterparts if the opportunity ever magically arose. Advice, presumably, that would alter the course of their lives for the better.
Yeah. Because young people listen sooo well.
If I'd been confronted by my aged, decrepit 30-year-old self when I was 18, I imagine it would have gone down something like this:
Me at 30: Avery, I've come from the future with a message for you.
Me at 18: Uh huh.
Old Me: I've come to tell you not to waste your time with the man you're with. He'll never appreciate you.
Young Me: That's not true. He writes me poems!
Age: You and I both know his poems are crap. He rhymes "good" with "food". He's an idiot.
Beauty: He's not an idiot! He's a musician.
30: No, he's a 28-year-old stock boy at an office supply store who happens to know a few riffs on the guitar.
18: Whatever. He'll make it someday.
30: No, he won't. You're gonna have to trust me on that.
18: Why should I? I believe in him! I looooove him!
30: Oh, good Lord! You're even annoying me.
18: Besides, he told me he wants to spend the rest of his life with me!
30: Oh, really? He asked you to marry him?
18: Well, not in so many words, but I'm sure one day...
30: God, you're stupid.
18: I am not! I graduated with honors!
30: Yeah, so did I, Einstein.
18: Whatever, loser. I'm Audi.
30: *sigh* Kids.