Monday, February 25, 2008

Sure, Buddy

My husband has delusions of grandeur.

Damn you, Guitar Hero!

As he rocks out to The Killers (on the Easy level, mind you), he poses like every cliche butt rocker--making the "guitar" an exaggerated phallic representation.

Yeah, like that doesn't reek of compensation.

He finishes his set with flourishes, missing nearly every note of the solo because, quite frankly, he sucks. But he thinks he looks good doing it.

After doffing his shirt and tossing it to me with a wink, he proceeds to murder "Paint it Black". He flails his guitar penis to no discernible rhythm and fails the song at 27%.

"There's something wrong with the controller," he claims. "Maybe it needs new batteries."

I regard him with thinly veiled skepticism. "Yeah," I reply. "That must be it."

I turn my attention back to Youtube and chuckle to myself.

It must be a guy thing.


Maria said...

I cannot tell you how hard I am laughing.

He was pretty good though, eh?

Maria said...

And yesssss - first AND second. BAM!

missburrows said...

Perhaps your husband's not working as expected because of a certain ummm...tweaking....that was done to it.

Groovy Mom said...


I never thought of a guitar as phallic before, but you are SO right!

Edge said...

Ahhh yes, the days when I COULD play guitar hero for 3 hours ... long since gone. I have a hard time finding 20 minutes to practice my REAL guitar for a REAL service during the week.

All this dude's flourish ... he gets style points with me.


holly said...

WOOOOOOOW! oh my god i feel really good about what i've done with my life. whe-eww! i sooo rock. i mean, in comparison to this guy. i am awesome.

i can sleep now a happy woman.

oh, and i feel really really good about who i am and am not married to (not = this guy, yay!).

missburrows said...

HOLLY!!! You are supposed to be sleeping by now! I am so telling Cami on you!

(Oh, hello Avery...hope you are feeling better.)

Doodaddy said...

Guitar penis. Nice.

Do they have a "Trumpet Hero" coming out?

:), Dd.

terri said...

Someone needs to get a life! Yikes!

P.S. Tell your hubby to calibrate the guitar and he'll score a lot higher. Not that I would know. Because I don't spend hours playing Guitar Hero. No.....

sybil law said...

That is not a guy.
That is a douchebag.

meleah rebeccah said...

my sons is only 11 and acts the same exact must be Guitar Hero

R said...

Men and games.

I don't get the attraction to guitar hero---why don't you guys just buy some guitars and really play?

I am ignorant on the subject though. I rarely played the Nintendo growing up because I was afraid to die.

Can you die on guitar hero? LOL

I hope you are feeling better.

Lilacspecs said...

Somehow I just don't think it computes that that's not a real guitar.

But hey, you get a free striptease, even if it is from your hubby :p

TheVasquez3 said...

OMG...i am rolling here. you crack me up and that youtube pushed me over the edge. way too funny!

Huckdoll said...

Bahahaha! OMG, Guitar freakin' Hero has definitely changed the way I look at men lately. *shudder*

nutmeg said...

Okay, that's just scary!

Emma Sometimes said...

I'm dying, that is FUNNY!!!!

Apparently the American Board of Pediatrics has never seen the potential workout in this bad boy.

Mr Engineer said...

The excuse of "the controller must be broken" harkens back to the days of Keleko Vision. It is better than turning off the game in the middle of the song.

I wonder how well he would score on "Final Countdown"?

suchsimplepleasures said...

so...that's what my boys are doing downstairs for so long...hmmm...i think that i WON'T be checking in on them!!

loveyh said...

OMG. Did Mr. Engineer beat me to the punch(line)???

We will turn him...muhuhahahahaha!

Daryl E said...

I am SO laughing before last nite I had no idea what Guitar Hero was .. Husband explained it and told me about the YouTubers .. too funny to come here today to see how you are and read this .. :)

Ruth said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ruth said...

I was laughing so hard I was about to stop watching the video... good thing I didn't, because it only got more entertaining as it progressed! :)

(I found your blog thru my friend Karen's!)